Saturday, March 01, 2008

recount of my late afternoon by messenger

The following is in unedited "yahoo messenger speak". A little tiny bit at the end if the post below anyoys you......

Terry Robinson: the world is going mad
Sarah: why?
Terry Robinson: at tescos at my car some stupid drug addict tried to rob me.
Terry Robinson: He tried to stab me with a syrinch
Terry Robinson: spelling
Sarah: really
!Terry Robinson: leather jacket took the needle
Sarah: omg
Terry Robinson: I laid him right out...POW!
Sarah: good
Terry Robinson: forgot I could do that....
Sarah: Sarah: you didn't get a scratch?
Terry Robinson: lifted him right off his feet...really hit him hard under the chin
Terry Robinson: nope needle sticking out of the jacket though
Sarah: did you call the cops?
Terry Robinson: police were debating whether to charge me with assault!!!!!!
Sarah: lol
Sarah: really!!!!!!!!!!!1111111
Terry Robinson: of course though other people had already called them
Sarah: clear case of self defense
Terry Robinson: he was strung out but had already robbed two people apparently...he's in hospital now
Terry Robinson: I knocked him cold....errrr
Terry Robinson: didn't really want to hurt him just didn't want him to hurt me....
Sarah: god it never rains with you does it
Sarah: well I think you are justified - you never know what the needle could be carrying
Terry Robinson: aids......
Sarah: I don't like violence bu
tSarah: .........1
Sarah: there are times when it is required
Terry Robinson: well to be honest I smacked him without thinking...only afterwards I feel odd about hands full of shopping loading the boot and he comes over and tells me to give him my wallet...and I say "piss off" and he overhands the needle bounces off my shoulder...he takes another sticks in the waist of the jacket and as he lunges forward his chin connects with a right upper cut...
Terry Robinson: down he goes.... and he lies there as I'm standing over him waiting for round 2
Sarah: no round two huh?
Sarah: so what did the police say exactly?
Terry Robinson: no movement.....
Terry Robinson: "why did you hit him?"
Sarah: err because he stuck a syringe in my shoulder!
Terry Robinson: tried too and wanted my wallet
Sarah: well if you hadn't had your leather jacket on he would have succeeded
Terry Robinson: and I'd be shitting myself
Sarah: yep
Sarah: so you ok about it?
Terry Robinson: a BIG fat guy covered in tatooes raced up in his car as he'd robbed his mother
Terry Robinson: the cops let me go then
Terry Robinson: the guy tried to give me a hug!
Sarah: what you mean you didn't accept a hug from the nice tattoo man?
Terry Robinson: not really ok about it...I hate violence
Terry Robinson: I'm not violent and am a bit amazed I reacted like that....I think there was a bit of "Jess rage" inside
Sarah: I guess
Terry Robinson: not a good day to fuck with me......
Sarah: obviously not
Sarah: I wouldn't put you down as a violent guy
Sarah: and needs must at times
Terry Robinson: probably the kick in the ribs after he was on the ground was not that well thought out.....
Sarah: so don't feel bad about it
Terry Robinson: but I WAS annoyed
Sarah: was it a bad kick?
Terry Robinson: ahhhh.......yes
Sarah: hmmmmmmmm
Terry Robinson: there was a last minute diversion from his head...I was astonished to see a needle sticking out of my jacket.....
Sarah: well can you imagine what tattoo man would have done if you hadn't done it first
Sarah: so I guess he got the best of a bad lot
Sarah: and maybe he will now get some help
Terry Robinson: he was " detained" for about 1/2 hr as he was trying to get at the guy
IN SCOTTISH BROGUE...If you can imagine the scene
Sarah: not really - but am trying
Sarah: cdan't imagine someone trying to mug you
Sarah: bit silly really
Terry Robinson: there was a tree hugging hippy woman telling me I was a rich bastard....BMW......
Sarah: what has that got to do with anything
Sarah: what that you can afford to be mugged
Terry Robinson: who knows?
Sarah: well that annoys me more
Terry Robinson: she said and I quote " you people are always pushing us down"......
Sarah: at least the druggy had an excuse for being an arse
Terry Robinson: well yes when you try and stab me....
Terry Robinson: "Oh you YANK RED NECK BASTARD!!!!!"
Terry Robinson: nice
Sarah: can I laugh ?
Sarah: laugh
Sarah: ?
Terry Robinson: We all smiled even the fat guy and his eyes were bugging out of his head....
Sarah: sorry - can't have been nice
Sarah: but does sound amusing in the telling
Terry Robinson: well after a glass of wine .....
Sarah: the sterotypical hippy woman just caps it
Terry Robinson: So the cop...who looked about 12 by the way...says " Sir it seems apparent that you have been rather inconvienienced. However it seems you have used excessive force...
cue scot
" He diny do enough to the bastaarrrd. I'd a kicked his firken heed innnnn!!!!"
Terry Robinson: cops now diverted to fat tatooed man
Sarah: lol
Terry Robinson: crowd gathering....
Sarah: I await your blog with bated breath
Terry Robinson: people start looking at my shopping
Sarah: seriously?
Terry Robinson: in the boot of my car
Terry Robinson: and on the ground around the boot of the car
Sarah: too funny
Sarah: sorry
Sarah: but just hysterical
Terry Robinson: "personal lubricant" drawing attention
Terry Robinson: only kidding
Sarah: all the staid saturday shoppers suddenly becoming curtain twitchers
Terry Robinson: the tree hugger ranting in the background.." you are an A-1 yank bastard"
Terry Robinson: and "fuck off you fat jock bastard"
Sarah: fat??
Sarah: well I would take exception to that
Terry Robinson: At this point I'm growing uneasy
Terry Robinson: about the very still junkie lying at the foot of my car
Terry Robinson: the scottish guy i think....
Sarah: hmm
Sarah: so how long did this drama last?
Terry Robinson: isn't "jock" a scots thing?
Sarah: yep
Terry Robinson: about 45 minutes
Sarah: but she is lucky he didn't have a pop
Terry Robinson: he said and I quote
" LISSSSEN you scraggly bitch! If in weren't fer these yellow coated basterds...I'd give yew a good seeing tooooo. eye think yer sum surt of greed y bithc of en encumplissss, ere check her deeeetails you young copper basturrrrd "
Sarah: lol
Terry Robinson: I said..." can I go now?"
Sarah: how the hell does a trip to tescos turn into a fiasco?
Sarah: it could only happen to to you
Terry Robinson: yep well it was rather more than I thought necesary to pick up a couple of light bulbs and some carpet cleaner
It all looks a bit strange when put like that......
A couple of things till I sign off:
Not seeing Jess this weekend though I should have.
I just watched a Brit movie called "Eastern Promises" about the Russian mafi in London.
Good movie but brutal.
Thank god for Omeprazole.
A VERY IMPORTANT perscription drug in my future.......
Lots of love to all and stay well

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good for you i also beleave in protecting one self and property , who else will :) take care penny x