Saturday, January 17, 2009


Ok the picture comes from my last trip.
I am wayyyyy too jet lagged to get any snaps today.
Here's how the last 36 hours went:
San Diego airport- I hand over the wrong passport and they can't find my electronic VISA.
I come up with the right passport and the dreaded "SSSS" pops up on my boarding card.
The BIG search ensues and they go through ALL my stuff, swiping everything with that little wand thingy with the little tissue on the end.
No problem, just inconvenience right?
"Ding , Ding, Ding!"- Alarm
Apparently the sensor picked up traces of lens cleaner on my 70mm-200mm lens.
25 minutes discussion.
OK free to go.
Arrive at LAX.
Onto the big bird.
FAT, STINKY man burps and farts his way through the flight next to me.
Climbs over me every two hours or so to go to the toilet and always returns with foul smelling alcoholic beverages.
No sleep for 13 hours.
Arrive Brisbane Intl airport and wait for bags to clear customs.
No bag.
45 minutes later on the train to the domestic terminal with little time to spare and upon entering the terminal hear: " Mr Terence Robinson please return to the International terminal and claim your luggage."
Back to International terminal.
Sydney flight time has come and gone.
No one knows anything about the announcement.
1 1/2 hours later bag found.
Time to clear customs.
Dog "hits" on my bag.
EVERYTHING emptied on the metal table and nothing found except half eaten chocolate bar and bag of peanuts.
Both dangerous items confiscated and I'm on my way.
Much hilarity at over packed supply of underwear.
All neatly folded by hotel laundry.
I appear to be a rather neat and precise fellow.
" Mate, what ARE you planning for this trip?"
Back to domestic terminal and secure last seat on next Sydney flight.
Arrive Sydney...........Bag arrives .....LAST off the plane and makes appearance as baggage carousel stops.
Nothing today is easy.
Fast forward to hotel
No trace of reservation.
Full house today.
T weaving slightly as tiredness threatens to erupt into bad temper.
"Don't you know who I am?" considered but bitten back.
Try pleading look and weak smile.
Silent beseeching and swaying in 5 star hotel lobby whilst other guests make wide detour to avoid scene as I rummage through bags looking for reservation.
Big wedding party arrives.
Bride's horrified expression prompts Front Desk Manager to make an executive decision.
Room secured.
Phone rings.
Credit card rejected.
Oh God.
Told to come down in 45 minutes: " NO EARLIER!!"
Once sorted out collapse in bed fully clothed and wake up as maid enters to clean up the room.
I must have looked as state as she scuttled away sharpish.
Love to all


Anonymous said...

Might be posting this for the second time - blogger went weird..

Ow. Bad day and a half.

I spent 12 hours on a flight next to a woman who stank like a rotting mule, got moved for the last hour after the screen in the back of my headrest went on fire. Wish I had had the wit to fuse it earlier.

Then there was the trip when they took me off the passenger manifest and removed my bags while I was in my seat. Quite some explaining at US immigration, bags arrived on day 4 of a 5 day trip (during which I was not at my most chic).

Lots more, but I'll park it for now.

Hope you've mnanaged to get some decent rest and are not too temporally f.u.b.a.r'd.

Take care, better luck on the return leg.


JR said...

Ahhhh . . .The excitement and romance of international travel . . .

Anonymous said...

Quite. Excitement? Romance?Hmmmmm. Apart from the occasional (and very welcome) frisson of an upgrade....